See, I can't even think if I'm looking for you in the crowd.

Here I am. 
I'm standing in the darkness, as I usually have been. 
I'm thinking of you, even though you don't even remember my name. 
It's hilarious. It's awesome. It's depressing.
Seeing you there, smiling, laughing, dreaming as if you had the whole world in front of you. 
That's the kind of moments I wanted to share with you, that's the kind of expression I always wanted to see in your face. 
That's where you are. Just across the hall. Just in front of me. 
I turn my face and there you are, as gorgeous as always. As distant as always. As impossible as the first day.
So I lie. I look in some other direction and I pretend I haven't seen you. 
I can't stand it, I can't. I'm not that strong and you must know it. 
We were pretty much alike. You were pretty much what I wanted, what I was looking for and you left. 
So, now I'm alone. Alone, not lonely, but it feels like the same for me. 
I'm surrounded of bunchs of people and I feel like drifting in a huge ocean of unrecognized faces.
You were light in the middle of my darkness and now everything is dark again. 
It's ok, you're happy, I guess. That's all I've alwys wanted to hear, to know. 
However, I guess I still need a little time to get over these feelings that grew up inside of me when you first kiss me. 
It was only a kiss for you but for me it was the sentence of a life wishing you and wanting you and needing you.
I'm paying for that debt. 

Belle.